It should not take me an hour and ten minutes to get to my doctor, normally a 25 minute drive. Drivers in Virginia really need to learn that sometimes, water falls from the sky, and that this does not mean the world is ending, or that they should drop their speed by half.
And yes, I understand that I was very late to my doctor's appointment, but I called you to tell you I would be, and you said it'd be ok, and that somehow means that it was ok to rush me through the whole damned thing and leave me feeling like I was being brushed off. I do appreciate the fact that you didn't listen to me at all when talking about the weird post-food sleep problems I've been having. I'm pretty sure that my example food (an apple) does not contain tryptophan. But hey, I got sleep drugs from you, so all is well, right?
And you know, I would have preferred not to tear my brand-new coat.
But I would have preferred tearing my brand-new coat to spilling the hot chai on my jeans. While driving. But that's ok. I got both.
And neither of those really compare to me somehow having my glasses leap from my face onto the wet asphalt for me to step on them.
And it's not my fault you didn't update your records to reflect that I called and asked to have my eye appointment rescheduled for an hour later. Oh yeah, and no, I won't take the glaucoma test with my contacts in. And I'm pretty damned sure you should have listened to me when I told you I can't see out of my right eye worth a damn with the contacts in, and when I told you that the whole "having to concentrate to focus on things up close" problem was still present. But no, ok, I'll just come back in two weeks, like you said. Sorry to take up your time. I shall enjoy spending the next two weeks squinting at my screen. Thanks.
And, dear Miss Pharmacist, did you really really think I needed to hear you say, "Wow, we see you in here a lot. You must have a lot wrong with you." ? I mean, really?
And, finally, how do you mess up an order for "two bean burritos"? Two. Bean. Burritos.