And, he's right. It's hilarious. Transcribed here for your perusal.
First the Muppets took Manhattan. Now they're taking the whole darn country. Kermit learned last week that he's getting a star on Hollywood's Walk of Fame, and his friends Bert and Ernie just released a feature-length solo video, "Bert & Ernie's Word Play." Newsweek's Katherine Stroup talked to the two fuzzy roomies (her interview is brought to you by the letters Q and A):
Why did you decide to make a movie?
ERNIE: We were just playing around with words, and somehow it ended up on tape.
BERT: Bootleg, I think.
But why are words so important?
B: We need words to sing and write and to talk on the phone. Without words we'd all have to get jobs as mimes.
E: And Newsweek would be blank.
Bert, about those eyebrows, would you ever consider waxing or tweezing?
B: No, no, no. Girls go gaga over them. Never underestimate the power of the unibrow.
And Ernie, why does Rubber Ducky make bath time so much fun?
E: He's bright, cute, and yellow. He goes squeak squeak. And underwater he goes glurg glurg. What could be better than that?
E: Well, bubbles and ducky together is especially good. But Rubber Ducky is my favorite pal. Well, except for Bert.
But just pals...
E: Bert's my best pal. Rubber Ducky doesn't have a unibrow.
Have you talked about getting separate places?
E: Oh, no, of course not.
B: I talk to Ernie about it all the time. I think it's time for him to leave the next.
E: But without Bert, who'd clean up? Who'd sweep? Who'd vacuum?
B: Excellent point.
Bert, last year there were pictures of you and Osama bin Laden? That wasn't really you, was...
[At this moment, the puppets' publicist breaks in: "That is totally irrelevant! That has nothing to do with us! We won't talk about that!"]
B: Uhhh, I guess I have no comment.
Reprinted without permission. Stroup, Katherine. "Bert and Ernie." Newsweek 8 Jul 2002: 63.