In order to renew my passport, I need my social security card. I lost my social security card years ago, in Hawaii.
In order to replace my social security card, I need my birth certificate. (See where this is going?) When my parents left Hawaii, my father carefully handed me my birth certificate, and told me to not lose it. I'm pretty sure I managed to not lose it for a few years.
In order to replace a lost birth certificate, I have to go to the State Department. No, really. I was born overseas, on a military base. The US Consulate issued my birth certificate. Well, my "Certificate of Live Birth of US Citizen Abroad."
That will take 4-8 weeks, on average, from the time I send in my paperwork. And, I'm going to need a bunch of information from my parents in order to fill in the papework.